Not the same

I am turning 21 on Sunday. I am so excited for this birthday! However, I started today I began to realize that 21 is a big number. When you turn 21 you are supposed to share it with all of your friends and have a good time. You are supposed to spend time with your family as well. As I was washing dishes today I looked at a picture of my grandparents that my mom has sitting on the ledge in front of the sink. I started to think about all the great times that I had with my grandparents when they were still with me. I remember running around in their house and staying the night when my parents went on vacation or just needed a night to themselves. They were always there for my birthdays and most summers we would spend out on their lake by their house. I started to think about how they weren't going to be able to make it to this birthday because they aren't with us anymore. The more I started to think about the more upset I got this. This is supposed to be a big birthday for me and I can't even share it with the two people that helped raised me and had a part in who I am today.

As my mind began to wonder even more I realized that one of my best friends that passed away at the beginning of the school year won't be able to share my birthday with me. This is what really hit me. Me, her, and another one of my friends would always talk about when we turned 21 and how great it was going to be especially when I turned 21 because I was the last one to turn 21. Now sitting here thinking about it makes me teary eyed. My birthday won't be the same without her. Of course my mind started to wonder even further and I started thinking about other important things in my life that I would love to share with these people but can't. When I get married my grandparents won't be able to see me walk down the isle. My friend won't be able to be a bride maid in my wedding. There are just so many things that they are going to miss and I hate that I can't share these big dates in my life. I can't share what would be important dates to my friend with her because she doesn't get the chance to have those dates. My 21st and my wedding won't be the same without these people here sharing it with me.

If I have learned one thing this year is don't ever take your friends and your family for granted. Tell them you love each and everyday. If you are fighting be the one to make it okay because you never know if they will be there tomorrow or if they will be able to make it to those important dates. So live life to the fullest make mistakes but learn from them. Love on everyone that comes into your life. If you have enemies forgive them. If you want to talk to someone do it don't wait until the next day or week. You never know who will be here for those important dates in your life.