Frustrated

Lately I have been very frustrated. The thing is I could not tell you why. I don't know if it is the stress of school almost being over and me freaking out about studying for finals and packing to go home and to go on vacation. I just have been very annoyed with everything lately. Every little thing has been making me really upset. It could be the littlest thing and it will just set me off and I hate it. I hate that I feel like this right now and I have tried to change my attitude but I just feel as though I can't and well to be honest it sucks. I am usually not a very frustrated person I usually don't let things get to me. I kind of just let them go in hopes that things will get better and most of the time they do. However, this time is different I don't know what it is about this time that I am so frustrated with but I am so over this attitude. I really want to have a good last week of my sophomore of college because I know it is something that I cannot get back. Nothing else has seemed to work so I decided to blog about it to see if that would help get some of my frustration out of me and on to a computer. A friend once told me that I needed to start writing because I can't just keep everything inside of me because it will eventually all just build up and I will just have one big break down and I definitely did not want this. So, I took his advice and I started to write in a journal. I would write about everything most of the time it was when I was really upset and needed to get everything out of me. Writing definitely has helped a lot when I am frustrated and upset or I don't know where to go. I think that is one of the reasons that I started to write a blog. I got tired of writing on paper and I thought hey wouldn't a blog be a good idea to start. I had always loved to read other people's blogs but I never thought I would start my own blog but look at me now I have a blog now and I blog about life and just different thoughts that I have.

Today's blog may not be as happy or uplifting as others but I haven't felt very happy lately. This week has been very stressful just trying to figure everything out that is going on in my life. It has been a week where I have just really reflected on this year. As I have said before this year has been different than any other year that I have ever been through. It was definitely worth all the pain and hurt that I had to go through to get to where I am today. However, where I am today is not where I want to be. I am restless. I want to get up and just go. I don't like staying in one place for very long. Especially when I know summer is just right around the corner. I am person who loves to be on the go. I love to travel. If I get the chance to go somewhere and I don't have anything else to do then I just go just to go. Abby and I definitely did a lot of traveling last summer. I think that is why we are so close sometimes. We don't like to just sit around we want to be up going somewhere or doing something. We just want to always be going somewhere. I guess I feel like if I am not going anywhere that my life is kind of useless. I am always up for an adventure. I always want to try new things and look for new places to travel to. I think that is why I am so excited to go on vacation because well first it gets me out of Indiana but it also is something new. I have been on cruises before but this is a different cruise it's smaller and it is not like any other vacation that I have been on. I am also going with people that I have not been on vacation with in a really long time. I know that a vacation will definitely relax me but I want to feel a little bit less stressed right now so that is why I am writing. I am just frustrated with life. I am upset that I could have done so much this year and I didn't. I am really frustrated that I am still allergic to bees. I know kind of random but I had to go get my allergy shot today and I reacted which is just so upsetting. I have been getting allergy shots since I was seven years old and I thought by this point in my life bees would not be a part of my life that I would have to worry about but they definitely still are. I know this blog is a bunch of me complaining and I would love to tell you that I don't complain a lot but that would be lie because I do complain a lot. Asks my sisters they will tell you. It's definitely something that I hate and I have been trying for many years to work on. I don't know what it is about complaining because in the end it gets me know where and most of the time it doesn't make me feel better. Anyways I feel a little bit better and I'm sure as the day goes on I will start to relax a little. I know that this blog was not very good especially because I complained a lot but thanks for listening.